What song reminds you, or what do you do to remind yourself, to be your true authentic self?
- True (five minute friday) (sabrinafowles.wordpress.com)
- Five Minute Friday: True (cultivatingtrio.com)
I am a big fan of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or ‘Tapping’ as it is known. It is a form of acupressure, like acupuncture but without the needles. It is clinically proven to work on so many issues. Originally used in the medical field, it is now widely used in the personal development field to achieve success and release limiting beliefs.
Tapping was, and still is, my most effective tool for reducing pain levels. And best of all, it is easy to use, and it is FREE to find thousands of tapping practitioners and their amazingly helpful videos on the Internet. You have nothing to lose by trying it, and oh so much to gain.
I discovered Tapping when my pain levels were consistently around 8/10, and when I practise it enough I am able to bring the pain level down to about 2/10. Some days even better and I am not troubled by pain at all. Oh those are excellent days! 😀
Margaret Lynch is one of my favourite EFTers. Her videos are really easy to follow along with. She covers all sorts of areas: anxiety, fears, success and abundance. I really like her easy, informal style and her tapping statements are very believable for me, which is a huge factor in the success of the technique.
I will let Margaret explain what tapping is, as she does it so much more eloquently and clearly than I could write it 🙂
Margaret is also talking about her new work and discoveries in this season of Healing with the Masters FREE teleseminars. If you are quick to register, by clicking on the picture below, you may just catch her as they are available for only a couple of days.
If you would like to study Tapping further, Nick, Jessica and Alex Ortner produce the best materials, and they host a Tapping World Series every year, similar to Healing with the Masters, where they interview the best teachers of tapping and you can listen for FREE. You can check out their website by clicking on the image below.
It’s about learning to keep your balance when the terrain, the waves, are constantly moving. And especially important when that big rolling wave approaches. You can’t ask life to stay calm, any more than you can ask the sea to stop the waves.
You will fall off that board so many times to begin with. It takes a lot of practice. The beauty happens when you manage to stay on that board when the big wave hits, and you stay above it and you RIDE THAT WAVE!!!
That’s how I am feeling at the moment. I am on top of that wave, riding high and it becomes more and more exhilarating moment by moment.
Last week I was blessed to meet Nik Halik, otherwise known as The Thrillionaire. He is Australia’s, and Greece’s, first civilian astronaut, and how inspirational to hear about his life. As a small child, he was unable to go to school due to ill health and allergies. His home education consisted of a set of Encyclopaedia Britannica. He would read it and think “I want to do that”, “I want to see that”, and “I want to go there”. He made a list at 8 years old, and has completed all but 2 intentions: to walk on the moon, and to live on a space station. He believes his success to be down to a lack of school and social conditioning that made him think he couldn’t do it, so he didn’t have those limitations. He is now in a position to do absolutely anything he wants to do, and he makes the most of his awesome experiences. Ask yourself, what would you do if you had no false perceptions of limitations?
This week, I have been in a live audience in a TV studio for the first time in my life. This was so exciting. It was a game show I have wanted to go on for some time, and I have applied. In the meantime, I decided I would like to be in the audience and I achieved this within a short time of setting my intention. It was a lovely drive to the other end of England, and I was very blessed to share the experience with a good friend who did the driving. I booked the hotel, which turned out to be really classy and comfortable, with delicious food in the restaurant. As a bonus, it turned out to be the same hotel the TV show contestants were staying in, so we had a great evening chatting with them too. It really feels like being on the show is getting closer to me.
Lovely as it is to visit new places and meet great people, it is also so comforting to get back home and take time to recharge one’s batteries. I discovered that Season 11 of Healing with the Masters is in progress, and this is just what I needed. 27 inspiring talks by some of the world’s most spiritual, motivating teachers and they are FREE to listen to. I have listened to the last 4 or 5 seasons and there is ALWAYS something in them that I believe I am meant to hear at that time, I call them my ‘golden nuggets’. Some of the teachers yet to present are:
* Margaret Lynch – one of my favourite EFT teachers and author of ‘The Secret of Intentional Wealth’. Heralded as “The Personal Power Rock Star” Margaret M. Lynch has x-ray vision for seeing the fears and limiting beliefs that keep success minded people limited in their money and personal power. An accomplished Success Coach, Transformational Speaker and author, Margaret delivers high-impact transformation that clears the inner blocks to wealth and personal power and creates the “on-fire enthusiasm and charisma” that is key to skyrocketing wealth.
* John Gray – John Gray, Ph.D. is the best‐selling relationship author of all time and the most trusted voice in relationships today. He is the author of 17 books, including The New York Times #1 Best‐Selling Book of the last decade, MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS. His 17 books have sold over 50 million copies in 50 different languages around the world.
And my plan for this weekend? Laughter Yoga! If you haven’t tried this, oh you must. If you want to instantly brighten your day up and move to a new, better energy frequency, you just can’t help yourself with laughter yoga. One of my local parks is running 3 free sessions and I am going to be there for every one of them. Sooooo looking forward to this.
Try it. I challenge you not to laugh and have a great day after this.
So, when you find your balance, forget those limitations and RIDE THAT WAVE! 😀
We often think and believe that our emotions occur as a result of what we experience, and are somewhat out of our control. If something happens that we like, we feel good, we feel happy. If something happens that we don’t like, we feel bad, sad, unhappy.
Of course it is natural for us to believe this when a crisis occurs. Faced with debt, ill health, or sad news about a relative or close friend, our first instinct is to feel bad. Whilst it is not wrong to feel bad, it is entirely human to do so, our problems occur when we hold onto that negative emotion and allow it to dictate further negative thoughts and actions, which can result in negative consequences.
For instance, have you ever been in a negative mood, perhaps because you’ve received some bad news or somebody upset you? Sometime later, maybe even days later, you are still in that heavy, bad mood and you snap at somebody else? The person you snapped at may or may not have any idea why you did that. You make them feel bad. They snap back. Or they may not, but they leave your company feeling bad. You may realise later that your action of ‘snapping’ was unfair and unjustified, and they really didn’t deserve that. Now you feel guilty. You add more heaviness to your mood. You may be able to call them and apologise and make you both feel better. But what if it was somebody you can’t contact? The cashier at the supermarket, or the person who accidentally bumped into you in the street and you bit their head off? What if they went home and took it out on somebody they love? It’s like a virus. See how it spreads?
You don’t even have to snap at somebody to spread the negativity virus. Have you ever spent time in the company of somebody who does nothing but perpetually moan and complain? Have you felt your energy drain from you? I call these ‘energy vampires’. And I’ll be totally honest with you. When I was going through my challenges, I became one!
I became isolated. Few people visited me, and if they did they didn’t stick around for very long. I then began blaming them for not visiting more, for not helping me, for not wanting to be around me. So what did I get? Of course, I got more of that! Truth was, when I look back, I wouldn’t have wanted to be around me either.
So, think of this from a different perspective. How would you feel if you could release the intensity of a negative emotion quicker, and therefore avoid spreading that awful virus? How could we avoid hurting others, and ourselves further, by bouncing back more easily into a more balanced, reasonable frame of mind?
Notice I did not say bounce back into a ‘positive’ frame of mind. In some cases, that may be far too much a stretch. Let’s face it, if you’ve only just found out that somebody close to you has died for example, and somebody says “Come on. Pull yourself together. Let’s go to that new comedy club in town. It’ll be great fun”, chances are that is NOT going to make you feel better. Thoughts of violence may even cross your mind.
But, even in a circumstance such as death of a loved one, it is possible to reach for a gentle, better-feeling thought, such as “they’re out of pain now”, or “they had a good life”, or chat with somebody about the great experiences you shared, and celebrating their life.
The important thing is to avoid getting stuck in that painful emotion, which can become crippling. It serves no purpose. In fact, it does more harm than good. And there’s no rational reason for it.
What does negative emotion do to our body?
Now remember I am not a medical or scientific expert, but I will try and explain this in lay person’s terms as I have come to understand it through my own research and experience of working through it.
Our bodies, perfectly designed by nature, have built-in responders called hormones. We are aware of the ‘fight or flight’ response. This served us well when we lived in caves, and we had to survive being confronted with wild animals on a regular basis. Our adrenaline kicked in and helped us deal with the situation. In some parts of the world this is still relevant, for instance tribes that live in the jungles. In some circumstances in Western society, it is also still relevant. Consider the child who gets run over by a car, and their mother, an average woman of average strength, finds the strength to lift that car by herself, off her child. Or the athlete or adventurer who need to perform in high-intensity situations. That is what adrenaline enables us to do. Cortisol is another hormone produced in times of stress.
In today’s westernised societies, we do not face such extreme dangerous situations on a regular basis, and the ‘fight or flight’ response would be more aptly be described now as the ‘anger or fear’ response, as those emotions more accurately describe our response to challenges. The body response, however, is the same. We release adrenaline and cortisol and other physiological responses occur.
The danger comes when we prolong the release of these hormones. They are only meant to be released for a short period of time. Think of the caveman facing the wild animal. He deals with it. He goes on with his life. The hormones stop releasing. Then he gets back out there the next day, and deals with it. If he kept the fear going, he wouldn’t go back out to face it again, and the human race would not have evolved, or even survived. Can you imagine him saying to Mrs Cave “I’m so scared. I can’t go out there tomorrow”?
By continuing to be angry, worry and stress, we keep these hormones releasing. This is so bad for the body. It weakens us. It damages our immune system. It can cause or contribute to so many bodily conditions, including chronic pain and cancer. Added to this, the body can become dependent and addicted to these chemicals, just as it can with alcohol, nicotine or drugs.
Stress is always caused by some negative emotion being held in the body.
The benefits of bouncing back
So consider the benefits of being able to bounce back to a more positive emotion, more quickly:
* It is good for your health
* It is good for your relationships
* It is good for other people
* You become more productive in your life
* It WILL improve your reality and your life
How do I do it?
The fantastic news is that ANYONE can improve their bouncebackability.
Please see Emotion Devotion – Part 2
In the meantime, you may like to watch this video – The Biology of Belief by Dr Bruce Lipton, who can explain the science bit much better than I can
Something spectacular happened when I made the decision that my life had to change and I stopped taking all the prescribed pain medications. My thought energy changed. It spurred in me a strong desire. The neuro-connections in my brain started firing off in all different directions. And the Universe, my Guardian Angels, God, whatever you want to think of it as, all conspired to help me make it happen.
I don’t have any particular religious beliefs. I always believed in spirituality rather than ‘formal religions’, and I am really enjoying learning about where science meets spirituality. I don’t NEED anyone to prove spirituality to me, but I am fascinated by the scientific discoveries now being made. I’m no scientific expert but it is making more sense to me as I progress through my journey.
You can also choose what you want to believe in. You will differ in your beliefs from many, and probably most, others but you’re not wrong whatever you choose. There are as many arguments for as against in the realms of science, spirituality, religion. I only know what works for me. Think about it: do you need to know how electricity works to be able to flick a switch to turn on a light? No, you don’t. You only know it works, and that’s enough.
So, I ended up in the hospital surrounded by inspiring ladies who made me laugh. There was no avoiding them. I was still in a lot of pain, but I was laughing, which I realised I hadn’t done for probably a year or more. Again, new thoughts, new actions, new neuro-connections. Endorphins began kicking in. By the end of the week, I was feeling somewhat better and most importantly, more hopeful. I began to see a light at the end of the tunnel.
I came home from hospital and felt like reading or watching something. I spotted a copy of a film, and remembered being given it by a physio I had visited for treatment in Spain some eighteen months previously, but I had never watched it. I had no idea even what it was about. With hindsight, he must have realised that my negative thoughts of pain were impacting on me, and was inspired to give me this copy.
Well, I sat and watched and felt completely inspired by it. Something just resonated within me so strongly.
I thought, it wasn’t just good luck that put me in that hospital room with those wonderful ladies that made me laugh. I had realised a desire to change, to get better. I had sent that strong request out to the Universe, and it had led me to the perfect place to begin the process. When I returned home, on a better energy frequency, it led me to watch this film.
This life-changing film is The Secret. It is about something called the Law of Attraction. It explains that basically we are like magnets. What we focus on attracts more of that. So I had been focussed on ill health and pain and what did I get? More of that! When I became more hopeful, I attracted more reasons to feel hopeful.
It works with everything. Focussing on debt or poverty? Here’s more of that. Focussing on broken relationships? There you go, you can have more of those too!
But the beauty lies in when you focus on the good stuff. Start feeling hopeful and here you are, more things to make you feel a bit better. Sit and count your blessings, oh here are so many more blessings for you.
What I realised was that when I changed how I thought about my circumstances, I saw more evidence that what I thought became my reality. It manifested before my eyes.
If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change
Dr Wayne Dyer
For instance, I had not been able to work for about 2 years. I was living on a very low income from sickness insurance, and it was not enough for me to pay all my bills and eat healthy nutritious food. Obviously my thoughts were poverty-focused. When I made the effort to change my focus I thought, I’m lucky that I have not been able to work, but I still have my safe home, and I have enough to eat, and I am able to manage my basics, things can only get better.
Almost immediately, reality shifted. I got not one but TWO tax rebates. I received two cheques from a credit card company who had accidentally overcharged interest on my accounts some 3 or 4 years previously, which I had no idea about. My sickness pay got reassessed and I was entitled to a higher amount, plus an award of back payments. I was able to bring my bills up to date, and this relief made it much easier for me to think better thoughts.
Life has continued to improve. Of course, it has it’s dips and challenges, but I realise that all I need to do is recalibrate and send out, in the correct way, that new desire borne from the challenge.
I will enjoy sharing more of my awesome experiences with you, demonstrating how a change in thought and energy frequency alters actual reality.
Watch the first 20 minutes of The Secret for FREE here:
Here is a gift to you from The Secret. It is an amazing visualisation tool. Watch it, daily if you can, and it will make you feel instantly better. Thank you for reading 🙂
(Disclaimer: I am not recommending you immediately stop taking prescribed medications. Mine were mainly for pain control, and not required to keep vital organs working. Please check with your doctor.)
Anybody who has been at sea will have been told this at induction. Just as anyone who has been on an aeroplane will have been told “Put on your own oxygen mask first before helping others to put on theirs”.
You can’t save somebody else if you are drowning yourself. You’re no good to anybody else if you’re not safe and strong yourself. Relate this to a real-life situation. Our first instinct is safety. If a crisis occurs, and you delay putting on your own life jacket, you will deprive yourself of immediate safety. You will begin to drown, and the first thing your body will do instinctively is grab at anything to prevent that happening. Chances are, you are going to drag others down with you. However, if you put on your own life jacket first, you will be safe and thus in a much better position to help others and save their lives.
Yet, we are brought up to believe it is selfish to think of ourselves before others. This is one of the biggest lies we tell ourselves. And one of the most important to let go.
How many times do we, as parents, say “I would DIE for my children”? Well, what good are we to them then? No child would want their parent to die for them. Think of the eternal guilt they would then be likely to live with.
Consider the alternative “I am strong enough to LIVE for my children”. How much better does that feel? How empowering is that small adjustment in thought?
You may think it is only different words, but it is so much more than that. It is a different thought, a different frame of mind, a different energy frequency, a different neuro-connection that your body responds to.
There are so many ways we don’t put our own life jacket on first everyday. We work our butts off trying to provide things for our family that they actually don’t need, and probably would rather go without than losing their parent to illness caused by exhaustion, and may even be doing them more harm than good. Do we really need the huge house, complete with huge mortgage, so children can have a bedroom each, whilst depriving them of the close lifelong bond that can result from sharing a bedroom, and the lessons they can learn about peaceful co-existence in sharing a close environment? Do they really need the designer clothes and shoes at the expense of not having their parent around to take them to the park, or to sit reading and discussing their day with them? Do they need a parent who is stressed, not available for them, or ill because they are run ragged. Or do they need a parent who looks after themselves: does yoga/exercise, goes for a massage, has time for a luxurious relaxing bath or anything else that truly relaxes them, and returns to their children happy and ready to spend true quality time with them?
It is awesome if you can have it both ways, if you can provide luxuries for your children, let’s face it we all want to do that, and do it without stress. However, the balance needs to be right, the foundations of love and presence need to be there. We want our children to be balanced, well-adjusted, able to take care of themselves. Therefore, we have to be the best example we can be.
It is natural for children to want material things. They are brainwashed by what they see around them. But consider this: given the choice, would they want that shiny new bike that will take you 10 hours of your time and energy to earn? Or would they prefer to have you spending 10 hours of your devoted time helping them renew and customise an old bike then going out for a long bike ride with them? Which one will cost you more? Which one will feel like putting on your life jacket and THEN helping them put theirs on? Perhaps you can ask them that question directly.
Did I achieve this balance when my children were dependant on me? Absolutely not.
Did I pay with burn-out? Absolutely I did.
Have I learned from this? Oh I so have.
I was so much more focussed on giving my children material things. I was so wrapped up in what I believed was society’s idea of a good parent, I didn’t realise what true parenting was all about.
Thankfully, my children are embracing this journey with me. We share so many blessings now. A few months ago my son heard me in conversation with someone and joked “Is she being annoyingly positive again?”. I asked him “Which do you prefer, the annoyingly positive person I am now, or the depressed miserable person I used to be?” His response was “Oh definitely the annoyingly positive one!”
A very commonly used quote, often by those annoyingly happy people who haven’t had REAL challenges: poverty, ill health, abuse, etc. in their lives. They haven’t been so down it’s impossible to see a way out of the troubles. They have minor annoyances and find it easy to solve their trivial problems. They have supportive families that will always help, they have the odd bout of ‘flu, not major health problems that take away their ability to work or go on nice holidays. They find it easy to be like Pollyanna and ignore what’s going on in the world, because a wealthy aunt will come along and rescue them from the orphanage and their life of loss and isolation.
Or so I once thought, and I know I was not alone.
Having experienced a challenging childhood, I found myself separated from my family in my early teenage years, in a childrens home and then foster care. I was isolated, abandoned and rejected. I had no power of my own to influence my destiny. My life was controlled by what went on outside of me. I was intelligent, but my educational potential was destroyed by having to move around and change schools. I was damaged and the whole world knew it, like the crumpled bit of litter on the street that people think nothing of stepping on, and some even liked to kick me around just for fun.
Divorced and a single parent by the age of 20, with no career prospects, I felt my life was an existence I just had to grit my teeth and bear my way through as well as I could. I believed I was not a fit mother to my two sons, they would be so much better off without me. I didn’t want them following my path.
Twenty years later, having followed this same rocky, difficult, crippling course through most of the way, I was mostly housebound, virtually bedbound, with ill health and disability. I had lost my job and income, and hadn’t even had a hot meal for several weeks. I believed I was near the end of my life, one way or another, because I knew this was not any kind of life. I had nothing to offer the world and couldn’t look after myself.
This was my defining time, something had to change. It was ‘do or die’. I stopped taking the mountains of pain and sleep medications I was prescribed, really not bothered about which way the consequences would take me. I went completely cold turkey. I ended up in hospital, where I was told “well of course you’ll be in pain if you’re not taking your meds”. I replied “but I have no life with them, I am like a zombie”. If it were not for my sons, I think I could well have taken the other option, and taken all my tablets and ended it there. But I thought if I stop taking them and I die, at least my boys would not have a suicide to deal with.
So I was put on a hospital ward for a week. There were 3 other ladies in my room. Well, they were the best roomies I could have had. Two of these ladies were there for cancer treatments, but they were so upbeat and funny they actually got me laughing and kept me laughing. I also had breakfast and two cooked meals each day. I felt my strength returning, and I realised how much I admired these two ladies who were dealing with cancer, and yet were so positive and uplifting to me.
An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming! – Unknown
I thought that period of about two years was the worst time of my life. Three years later, I look back and I say Thank You. I believe I had to get so low that UP was the only way to go. I had to recognise that it was only I who had the power to steer my own life. Nobody else could fix me: not family, friends, doctors or the government.
I discovered things that made me question my thoughts. Made me think about what was real, what was true, and how my thoughts impacted on my reality. How, up to that time, my thoughts, and the actions they caused me to take, were so destructive. How a small change to a thought, a perspective, can alter reality hugely and exponentially.
To start with, changing the way you think is not easy. It doesn’t come naturally. It doesn’t change your life overnight. I had had over 40 years training and practice in negativity. This is turning everything you believe on it’s head. The one thing I did remind myself, and still do, was that it obviously wasn’t working before, so what did I have to lose by trying something different?
I discovered many strategies that help me tune in to better-feeling thoughts. That helped me sift through the lies I have believed, and let go of them. I practised many concepts that were previously alien to me. And I noticed my world, my reality, began to improve.
I had many regrets about experiences in my life. Then I realised that everything that had happened before had shaped who I am today. I am happy with who I am today, so how can I now regret what brought me to this place?
I developed confidence in my own abilities, to know for myself what made me feel better, and what made me feel worse. I made conscious decisions to go with the flow of the better.
I am sharing my journey with you. I would love for you to join me. And I would love to join you in sharing your thoughts and experiences too.
Some things you may resonate with, feel ease about, and some you may not. That’s OK. Take what makes you feel better. Discard what does not. We are all on our own unique path. Our own amazing journey of self-discovery. We are all beautifully different, and yet all perfectly connected.