An Introduction to Mindfulness

mindfulness, mindfulness summit, depression, Mark WilliamsThe Mindfulness Summit: Day 1

Professor Mark Williams is Emeritus Professor of Clinical Psychology at Oxford and was also the Director of the Oxford Mindfulness Centre until his retirement in 2013.

Professor Williams, along with colleagues John Teasdale (Cambridge) and Zindel Segal (Toronto), developed Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy for prevention of relapse and recurrence in major depression. He is also co-author of the best selling book ‘Mindfulness: Finding Peace In A Frantic World.’

In this interview Mark elegantly answers the question ‘what is mindfulness?’ He also leads 2 simple introductory practices for beginners and talks about why mindfulness is so effective for the treatment of depression relapse.

IN THIS INTERVIEW YOU’LL ALSO DISCOVER…

  • The difference between mindlessness and mindfulness.
  • Why mindlessness often gets us into so much trouble.
  • The cutting edge research on mindfulness for depression (Mark is one of the world premiere researchers in this field).
  • The ‘breathing space’ mindfulness practice, which is great to use in times of stress and difficult emotions
  • How to use ‘habit releasers’ to bring more mindfulness into daily life.
  • An experience of the ‘body scan’ mindfulness practice.

To watch, listen and download this interview, register FREE for The Mindfulness Summit HERE or click one of the banners in this article.
mindfulness, mindfulness summit, depression, Mark Williams

You may also like this short video of Mark reading “Hokusai Says“. I certainly enjoyed it after listening to the interview.

 

Your Spiritual Support System

Your Spiritual Support System

spiritual support, support system, spiritual support system, hay houseYou’ve got the power to feel vibrant, healthy and happy!

You don’t have to go your journey alone.

No matter how strong you are, every once in a while, you need someone to lean on. And when it comes to making real shifts in your life…sometimes it feels like you need more than a person, you need a village of support to help you stay on track.

Surrounding yourself with people who know how you feel because they are on the same path is one of the best ways to reach and maintain any goal you have. A Hay House author, Gabrielle Bernstein, suggests in Miracles Now, “Find your spiritual community. Open your mind, spirit and social media stream to receive a spiritual running buddy of your own.”

You can connect with others for support and continue to share your personal journey long after the Summit ends. When you join this 10 day online webinar, you gain instant access to other people, just like you, who want to connect, share and improve all areas of their lives – a spiritual community you can tap into anytime for what you need most to stay on track.

Hay House truly wants you to feel great about the journey in discovering new ideas and developing new tools while also connecting with new friends along the way who can offer support and encouragement when you need it most. Plus, this community gives you a chance to be a spiritual running buddy for others as well, which always feels great!

And you don’t have to absorb or listen to every single lesson! Another great tip from Gabrielle’s book, Miracles Now, is when it comes to setting goals or making changes in your life, “Keep it simple. Go Slow. Be the Happy Learner.” Simply choose one main area to focus on and make that change consistent over the next 10 days. Then, when you feel ready, you can build on the small successes over time and create radical shifts that bring daily peace and happiness to your life. Be gentle with yourself when you falter and pat yourself on the back when you succeed – and most importantly, share what you learn with others!

gabrielle bernstein, meditation, spiritual supportWhat you’ll learn during the World Summit:

• Meditation for modern times
• Practical tips for attracting abundance and prosperity
• Shed pounds WITHOUT dieting
• New scientific discoveries in the mind/body connection
• Reveal your true purpose using The Passion Test

Join the Hay House World Summit and Facebook Community to feel:

• Supported, more hopeful and more able to take control of your life and your health.
• More in touch with your intuition, happier, and more motivated to make food and thought changes to enhance your sense of well-being and unlock your inner vibrancy. And you’ll feel more connected to others sharing in the same journey.
• Inspired, capable, and deserving to pursue what matters most to you. You’ll feel this way because you’ll learn to listen to your inner guidance system and how to call forth your guardian angels.
• A sense of freedom and weightlessness that will be completely new to you ? you’ll see how your new positive thoughts and daily habits bring more good into your life each and every day. Your mind will be open to new possibilities for making money, finding a compatible partner, and giving yourself permission to be, do and have what you really want.

We’re all about sharing the love! So, if you know anyone who needs a little lift and community support, we encourage you to share the Hay House World Summit!
Join us for 10 days to feel your way to more love, more joy and more abundant energy!

Keep learning for years to come!

Due to the overwhelming response to last year’s World Summit packages, Hay House is offering similar packages for this year’s Summit, but with even MORE GREAT CONTENT and BETTER BONUSES!

Hay House digital package, digital downloads, Hay House World Summit 2014Change Your Life Digital Downloads – $197
(Retail Value $1,644 with bonuses)

• Digital Downloads of all audio interviews
• PDF transcripts and worksheets

PLUS, Enjoy Bonus Gifts valued at over $394!

You won’t believe the huge bonuses they’re throwing in this year with the Change Your Life package!

Here’s what people said about last year’s World Summit:

“It made me really understand my journey and what I was doing and the purpose of it. It really explained a lot for me and gave me so much encouragement… that I’m on the right track.” —Arlene

“This was amazing. So many practical tools that can help me connect with my intuition on a deeper level for the answers I seek. It came just at the right time and reminded me to listen to my gut.” —Orly

“Best talk I have heard out of the 25 years I have listened so far. This is info everyone needs to know. Life saving and life enhancing! Thank you.” —Felice

“Wonderful stuff coming from deep insight and compassion. Material to mull over for months and years to come. Thank you for opening these doors for us.” —Charlaine

“There were so many messages in the interview with Doreen Virtue that spoke so clearly to me. It touched many aspects in my life that are occurring in this present moment. I felt like I was meant to listen to this. I can’t even begin to describe the clarity this one interview has brought to my life.” —Monique

“Wow! This interview was so inspiring. I love Iyanla’s raw truth. I also loved her explanation that we are constantly tested at the level we need to learn, because we didn’t get it again!! Thank you so very much!” —Lyn

“I shed a few tears, laughed and experienced a real ‘ah ha’ moment that will help me step forward in life. THANK YOU.” —Marnie

“Loved it. It was really nice learning about the science of my body and helping me learn how to best treat it.” —Charlotte on Donna Gates interview

“First of all I thank Hay House for bringing such beautiful souls together. You have actually created a paradise of angels who are so loving, caring and willing to share their knowledge through this forum. God Bless!” —Sheetal

“I now know what I need to practice and focus on. Just brilliant.” —Eternal A.

“I am in awe of this summit and amazed at what I’ve learned and how to see a different view. There are so many wonderful people from Hay House who have been inspiring and no matter where you are on your journey, there is always something new to learn.” —Lucinda

“I experienced tears of OMG, we can choose and BE living here. Nothing will remain the same for me; it just gets better! And I thank you for that awakening.” —Anne

Your Spiritual Support System

Is Your Food Hurting You?

Is your food hurting you?

is your food hurting you, food addiction, chemicals in foodI realised why I have had a PROPER chocolate binge day today – because I stopped drinking cows milk several days ago.

The body will often crave things which we give up, especially if they are not good for us, because it has become ADDICTED to the bad stuff and chemicals in it, in the case of cows milk all the vaccines and antibiotics that are pumped into the cows.

I have noticed, even in a few days of not drinking cows milk, the eczema on my hands clearing up, which I have long suspected is caused by dairy. To me, eczema or any other manifestation on the outside is only the outspill of not good stuff on the inside. And goodness knows what’s going on on the inside.

I have suspected dairy for quite a long time, in fact I had fairly strong evidence to support my suspicion. However, I have struggled to find a suitable alternative. There are alternatives out there, but I tried several of them and found I didn’t like them in a cup of tea, or on cereal. You can get soya, almond, hazelnut, rice milk etc. but I think I have found one that satisfies my needs and taste buds in coconut milk.

If you have health issues, listen to your body, question its cravings and addictions, what you think you love to eat could be the very thing that’s hurting you. It could be anything from chinese food to soda drinks to chewing gum.

Common culprits are things like MSG, used to enhance the flavour of food, artificial sweeteners such as aspartame, and many more.

Start checking your labels. The less chemicals in a food, the better it will be for you.

If you really crave a food, you can bet your bottom dollar it has something in it that’s not very good for you. After all, when was anyone addicted to an apple or an avocado? By the way, they would be exceptionally good things to try and become addicted to!

It can be difficult to give up food we think we enjoy eating, but if we make a conscious decision to love our bodies, we can ask ourselves “Do I really want to give my lovely body this thing which will hurt it?”.

Would you do that to a loved one? Why do it to yourself?

Is your food hurting you?

10 Days to Feel Great!

10 Days to Feel Great!

It’s not always easy to decide what is best or which path to take.

One of Louise Hay’s favorite affirmations is:
Trust in Life. It will bring you all that you need.

Throughout her writings, she reminds us that the key to trusting in Life is to love and accept yourself as you are and to never stop learning.

You can experience peace, trust and joy every day by doing these three simple things:

  1. feel great, hay house world summit 2014Love yourself
  2. Learn continuously
  3. Help others

Wouldn’t you like to feel more…

  • Loved and appreciated
  • Happy and fulfilled
  • Excited about your life
  • Trust that Life will take care of you
  • Worthy and deserving of having all you want
  • Connected to your loved ones
  • Energetic and youthful
  • Supported by the Universe
  • In control of your life

Let’s find out what’s really holding you back from feeling exactly the way you want.

Here’s a quick exercise to help you uncover your hidden beliefs that could be getting in the way of your health and happiness:

Ask: How do I feel about myself?

Write all of your thoughts on paper and read them out loud.

How many were positive?
How many were negative?

Don’t get caught up in judging how many thoughts were negative.  Just being aware of the negative beliefs you hold inside is very powerful!

And you know what’s even more powerful?  Turning all of those negative beliefs into positive statements.

For example, take this negative thought:  “I’ll never make enough money.” 

And try saying this instead: “I always have everything I need.” Or “I always have more than enough.”  Or “I make plenty of money.” Use whichever positive statement resonates with you.

Guess what happens once you change your thoughts and truly love and accept yourself?

Good things start happening because you feel good about yourself.

But, it’s easier said than done, right? It’s often difficult to know how to get started.

We can help you take the first step. The techniques, lessons and insightful new thinking we are sharing this year in the Hay House World Summit is exactly what you need to feel better about yourself and to feel more connected, more loved and more at peace so that you can attract more GOOD into your life!

Even if you don’t have time to listen to every speaker each day, you can choose one speaker or topic that interests you and make the most out of that lesson. You’ll be amazed how much can change just from one lesson!

Register now for the Hay House World Summit and start learning new ways to feel loved, worthy and valuable!

You might be thinking you’ve heard it all already or the World Summit might work for other people, but won’t help you. Guess what? Those are all the types of thoughts you need to be aware of and ask yourself, are these thoughts really true?

We all have unique stories and circumstances that shape our lives, but the path to peace and happiness is always the same: learn, love and help others. It’s really that simple.

Beginning May 31st through June 9th, come along with us for a heart opening journey in discovering new healing methods, exploring your creative side, igniting your passion and feeling better than you ever imagined!

10 Days to Feel Great!  

Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It

Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It

In this speech, Kamal Ravikant shares some wisdom on why self-love is really what truly matters in life. He then goes on to talk about the importance of truly loving yourself.

This is a raw, honest, 20-minute video summary of how a highly successful entrepreneur and investor was forced to re-evaluate his life. Kamal beautifully connects the left-brained world of Silicon Valley, with the world of the heart.

love yourself, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It, kamal ravikantIn his book, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It, Kamal talks about how not loving yourself causes crippling depression, even if the outside world sees someone successful. Kamal goes on to teach how to reconnect with your authentic self, realising what is truly important in life, and how being true to yourself can bring you back to unbreakable success.

Find Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It at Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk

Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It

Symptoms are a sign: they help you back on track

Symptoms are a sign: they help you back on track

Symptoms are a signEven positive thinkers go through some tough times, and I don’t mind admitting that I’ve had a pretty crappy several months. Everybody has them, the key to being positive is to think, “So what can I learn from this to help me move forward?”.

My energy level dipped so low, and I have seen and felt this reflected in just about all areas of my life: health, home, finances and personal relationships. I have really beaten myself up even further at times because with all I have learned the last few years, I tell myself I should know better. “It’s easy Di, just keep laughing,” I tell myself, but then the laughing stopped, until I hated myself for feeling so self-pitying.

Many people feel low over the winter months, and I have come to realise by my own experience how much more this can affect people with chronic pain and illness, for whom the cold and dark winter months become so much more isolating.

I have made so much more effort during the summer months to build up my energy levels – eat well, socialise as much as possible, take meditative time out in nature – that it came as a shock to me just how far my energy dipped this winter. I was doing really well until September when, for medical reasons, I lost my driving licence for a few months, which led to me being confined to the house much more than usual. It took some much appreciated effort from my doctor to retrieve it. However, the stress did me no favours and I felt the downward spiral, from which I didn’t recover too well. I have written about these downward and upward spirals previously and how they work in our lives, but even I was really struggling with it this time. My pain levels were sky-rocketing, sleep pattern was non-existent (lots of it but erratic and non-refreshing), and depression was smothering me.

About six weeks ago, just before I went to Spain, I told my doctor I felt I had really lost my grip. I’m fortunate to have a doctor who supports the more holistic and natural methods I have discovered, even if she doesn’t completely understand them. She thought it a good idea to do some blood tests, so I asked if I could have the full lot done, including vitamins, which aren’t routinely tested here in the UK.

On my return from Spain (part of which holiday provided further evidence of my low energy frequency), a letter informed me I needed to contact my doctor about the blood tests. After chatting about my holiday and how I could not get the pain and sleep back to a manageable level, she told me that the blood tests showed me to have severely low iron ferritin and vitamin D levels. I had to have been running low for several months for the levels to become so severe.

The low iron would account for the increased fatigue and low energy, and the low vitamin D would be causing increased pain and many other symptoms. Anyone with fibromyalgia knows that increased everyday pain is not good. By the way, vitamin D is not strictly a vitamin but is a hormone.

This really made sense to me. Not going out so much would deprive my body of natural sunlight which provides the vitamin D. Not shopping for the fresh food that is more available in the summer, and not paying enough attention to dietary requirements, eating much more convenience food over the winter, was depriving my body of much-needed good nutrition, including iron. These are factors which I imagine would affect many people restricted through disability or infirmity. As energy levels dip, it becomes even more difficult to take care of oneself properly, and so the downward spiral begins and propels itself.

Ordinarily, I would listen to these results and say, OK I need to get out in the sunlight and need to do something about my diet. However, I had to recognise I am not strong enough to do that at the moment, and have appreciatively welcomed the intervention prescribed by my doctor of a 3-month supply of iron and vitamin D tablets – a relief to my doctor I believe as she does know my level of reluctance to take medications, as I see many as a band-aid over a deep wound. As a precaution, we’ve also added in some magnesium supplements as that helps the body with absorption of other vital nutrients.

My message here is one of taking notice of the symptoms. Symptoms are not meant to make you stay where you are. Symptoms are a sign that you need to do something different, change direction. They tell you when you are not treating your precious body correctly. If left unnoticed, they can cause permanent damage to the cells of your body, and store up further problems for the future, not only physical damage but emotional damage in the way you start mentally treating your body and mind too with negative thoughts.

Fatigue, pain and low mood are not always something you can cure with positive thinking, and are not to be taken for granted. They should always be checked out. As mine was, your body may be crying out for some loving nourishment.

Personally, I am still a reluctant pill-taker, I believe nature provides everything our bodies need, and we’ve got to feed ourselves properly. However, for the moment, I’m going to stop beating myself up that I should be able to positive-think my way out of it. I’m going to be kind to my mind, as that needs emotional nourishment too.

I am looking forward to feeling physically healthier, and I have given myself a task for this year, to build a collection of some simple recipes, with easily-accessible natural, nutritious ingredients that will fulfil all my dietary requirements to keep me healthy in winters to come, and ensure I go for some time outside, no matter how cold the weather is.

Symptoms are a sign: they help you back on track

3 Steps for Having Money Conversations With Your Partner

3 Steps for Having Money Conversations With Your Partner

Money Conversations With Your Partner, money talksIt starts a week from today!

Join us for our 9-day The Art of Love Relationship Series, starting next Tuesday, April 1st!

Register for this FREE event HERE

Gina DeVee, one of the 55 love and relationship experts featured in The Art of Love Relationship Series, will be speaking on a panel about “Overcoming Money Madness: The Secrets To Navigating Rough Financial Waters With Ease.” Gina recommends following these 3 steps when having conversations about money with your partner:

“Step one is related to how we can sometimes be polarized in our thinking in society, where something needs to be either one or the other—and I’m a big fan of taking a stand for the ‘and.’ So for example, if one member of the couple wants to save and the other wants to take a trip to Italy, really exploring first and foremost how might both be possible? How can you create or manifest the funds to do what both people desire?

My second step is to be really curious in love. Relationships are teachers. So if your partner says, ‘I really think that we should buy this house,’ or ‘I really think that we should pad our nest egg,’ rather than react because you have the opposite viewpoint, really be curious about your partner, and discover why that is important to him or her, and see what else you can learn and fall more deeply in love with that person for, and how it can expand your own viewpoint.

And then the third step that really requires personal responsibility is to know thyself. Most of us are just operating out of money rules that were passed down to us versus really investigating for ourselves what is true for us. So if one person thinks, ‘Oh, I must buy a house,’ well, is that true for you and is that really part of your own value system, or did your parents tell you you were throwing money away if you were renting? So really knowing what your own truth is, is critical.” —Gina DeVee

Join Gina and all 55 of the world’s most respected love and relationship experts during our 3rd annual FREE 9-day The Art of Love Relationship Series. Starting on Tuesday, April 1st, you will learn the latest insights about how to have a more connected, satisfying relationship—and deeper love—than you ever thought possible.

Register for the free event here, and watch 3 pre-event bonus interviews with Deepak Chopra, Dr Jenn Berman and Michael Bernard Beckwith

3 Steps for Having Money Conversations With Your Partner

Getting What You’ve Been Craving In The Bedroom

Getting What You’ve Been Craving In The Bedroom: How To Make Your Sex Life More Intimate Than It’s Ever Been

Dr. Jenn Berman

Getting What You’ve Been Craving In The Bedroom: How To Make Your Sex Life More Intimate Than It’s Ever BeenDr. Jenn Berman is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Los Angeles. She is the host and lead therapist on VH1′s Couple’s Therapy where she does intensive therapy with celebrity couples. She has appeared as a psychological expert on hundreds of television shows including The Oprah Winfrey ShowThe Today ShowThe Early Show, and HLN.

Watch Dr Jenn Berman and Arielle Ford Now – at absolutely no charge

Open communication about sex is what makes sex better. But navigating those conversations can be really tricky business. Discover how to comfortably and effectively communicate with your partner about sex — and then reap the rewards!

In the main event webinar you’ll also learn:

  • The #1 reason a partner withholds sex – and what to do if that’s happening to you
  • Where, when and how to bring up the subject of sex
  • How to ask for what you want – and get it!
  • Important do’s and don’ts for flirting with your partner
  • How to break the news that you’ve been faking – and end up (actually) satisfied!
  • The #1 way to give suggestions so your partner wants to take them
  • Top 4 reasons – especially women – lose their libido (and how to get it back)
  • Why surrendering could be the sexiest thing you do

Watch the short video with Dr Jenn and Arielle here!

This video is just a small preview of a truly remarkable, free online event Arielle is hosting for the third consecutive year: The Art of Love Relationship Series set to kick off on April 1st, 2014. Starting with the LIVE kick-off on April 1st, and for 9 more powerful days, you’ll hear from over 50 of the world’s most respected love and relationship experts . . .Art of Love Relationship Series 2014

They’ll be sharing the latest insights about how to have a more connected, satisfying relationship—and deeper love—than you ever thought possible.

(Mark your calendar now so you don’t miss it!)

Faculty for the series includes Dr. John Gray, Harville Hendrix, Alison Armstrong, Dr. Gay Hendricks, Dr. Katie Hendricks, Neale Donald Walsch, Katherine Woodward Thomas, Claire Zammit, Lisa Nichols, Arielle Ford, and many others.

Dr Jenn Berman will also be participating in Seminar 4: Becoming Partners In Parenting: How to Parent As A Team Even When You Disagree alongside Jacqueline Green and Dr. Laura Markham.

Watch the Video & Register for the Event at No Charge

P.S. Even if you have already registered for the event, enter your details again to watch the video.

Getting What You’ve Been Craving In The Bedroom: How To Make Your Sex Life More Intimate Than It’s Ever Been

The Art of Love – Relationship Series 2014

The Art of Love – Relationship Series 2014

Art of Love Relationship Series 2014I have a brand new, never-before-seen video to share with you!
It features world-renowned mind-body physician and New York Times #1 bestselling author Deepak Chopra and bestselling love and relationship author Arielle Ford.

In this short video, Deepak shares powerful, fast-working tips that will not only help you create a whole new level of connection and intimacy with your partner than you ever imagined possible . . .

They will also help you to identify and break unconscious habits that stand in the way of true intimacy. And if you’re not in a relationship right now but are hoping to be someday soon, these insights will help you experience the deeper levels of intimacy you’ve always wished were possible when that happens.

Watch Deepak Chopra and Arielle Ford Now – at absolutely no charge

Most of us want to feel truly seen, heard and understood by our partner, and to experience the kind of close connection we know we deserve. But in our modern world, we’re so busy and distracted that often there just doesn’t seem to be enough quality time available to spend with our partners to begin with . . . In this short video:

“The 4 Simple Steps To Deeper Connection:  How to Overcome the Challenges of a Modern  Relationship and Find the Intimacy You Crave”

Deepak shares techniques you can use right away to overcome those challenges by taking better advantage of the time you do have together to create more closeness and intimacy in your relationship!

Watch the short video with Deepak and Arielle here!

Deepak and Arielle dive right in, sharing the techniques you can use to build more connection in your relationship! In this video, you’ll discover . . .

  • 3 daily habits that will increase intimacy

  • A simple mindset shift that will create the conditions that cultivate love instead of smothering it or pushing it away

  • The 4-step process that will help you give up your need to control and instead allow you to get closer

  • How to find and maintain a state of “allowing” so that love flows to and from you freely

Access the Deepak Chopra and Arielle Ford video Now

This video is just a small preview of a truly remarkable, free online event Arielle is hosting for the third consecutive year: The Art of Love Relationship Series set to kick off on April 1st, 2014. Starting with the LIVE kick-off on April 1st, and for 9 more powerful days, you’ll hear from over 50 of the world’s most respected love and relationship experts . . . Art of Love Relationship Series 2014

They’ll be sharing the latest insights about how to have a more connected, satisfying relationship—and deeper love—than you ever thought possible. (Mark your calendar now so you don’t miss it!)

Faculty for the series includes Dr. John Gray, Harville Hendrix, Alison Armstrong, Dr. Gay Hendricks, Dr. Katie Hendricks, Neale Donald Walsch, Katherine Woodward Thomas, Claire Zammit, Lisa Nichols, Arielle Ford, and many others.

Watch the Video & Register for the Event at No Charge

Here are just a few of the enthusiastic responses Arielle has received from people who have attended The Art of Love Relationship Series in the past:

“I’ve experienced a shift of consciousness. Instead of empty and lonely and longing for love, I feel full, beautiful, and ‘in love’ with a sense of expectancy and readiness for this love relationship about to manifest!” —Nia

“This program has taught me so much about myself and my perception of love. I have been awakened and forever changed by my new knowledge. All the questions I’ve had have all been closed. This is the big piece of the puzzle that has been missing for me my entire life!” —Heather

“I was floundering in a sea of failed relationships, but now I look to the future with hopeful expectation!” —Al

“I now feel a sense of healing and opening of my heart so I can love and be loved. I highly recommend The Art of Love for anyone searching for a soulful connection and anyone who wants to grow the existing love connection.” —Karen

Join me, and together we’ll take in everything this brand new series has to offer!

P.S. Remember, you’ll get instant access to the video with bestselling authors Deepak Chopra and Arielle Ford sharing the latest research and advice on how to create a more intimate and connected relationship than you ever thought possible!

Watch the video now at no charge

The Art of Love

Beating the Internal Bully

Beating the Internal Bully

beating the internal bully, internal dialogue, how do you speak to yourself
Photo courtesy of
Zen to Zany

Every day you are talking to yourself in your head.  Often you are doing this unconsciously without really being aware of what you are doing.  Discover how this affects your life and how you can change it.

There are many things that drive people to success, and a key factor is what is known as ‘internal dialogue’. This is the dialogue that is constantly playing inside your head. It’s the voice that starts talking as soon as you do something, meet someone, or think about anything.

In many cases, this voice can be destructive and knock you down, though it is possible to quite easily harness this internal dialogue and use it to propel you to the success you desire and deserve.

You may notice that on occasion the voice is negative in what it says. For example, you see something you really want to buy and it says, “You can’t afford that.” Or you see someone you are really attracted to and the voice says, “They’re way out of your league, they’ll never go for someone like you.”

At it’s worst, and most destructive, it beats you with words like “You’re not good enough”, “You don’t deserve to be happy”, and it is this internal bully saying “You’re too fat” or “Why don’t you look like her/him?”, that causes conditions like eating disorders and depression.

We sometimes speak to ourselves in a way we would not allow others to speak to us. If a friend spoke to us in this way, we would not be friends with them for very long.

Quite obviously, this does nothing to make your life any better. Therefore, why not change the content of the voice? When it says something negative, counter it with a positive suggestion. For example, when the voice says, “You can’t afford that.” Respond mentally in a firm and positive voice with something like, “How can I afford it?” A question that empowers you and propels you into positive action. Or train yourself to positively affirm “I’m perfect just the way I am”, because everybody IS uniquely perfect.

This may take some time, and you may notice initially you do not always catch the voice and correct it. However, keep it up and before you know it, you will have changed the negative dialogue into a positive, empowering one.

You can also change the tone of the voice. What would happen if instead of the usual tone of voice saying, “I can’t afford it” you hear the voice of Homer Simpson, or Donald Duck, or any comic character saying it? You certainly wouldn’t listen to the voice and take it seriously, you would laugh at it and it’s power over you would be broken.

This technique can be extended to helping you motivate yourself to do something. When faced with the washing up, what do you hear in your head? Do you hear a whiny voice saying something like, “You really ought to do the washing up or you’ll get into trouble” or a commanding and scary voice saying, “Wash up NOW!”?

What would happen if the voice were a soft and really seductive voice speaking in your head? The sort of voice that gives you shivers down your back. What if it said something like, “Let’s do the washing up big boy.”? How would that motivate you?

Stephen King, the author, uses this technique with his writing. When he has to write he hears this very loud and powerful voice shouting at him as if through a megaphone saying something like, “WRITE NOW!!!!!” It almost scares him in to writing.

However, you don’t need to scare yourself into action. You can change your internal dialogue to be anything you want; whatever works best for you to motivate you and help you to get where you want to be.

Listen to your internal dialogue and play with changing the tone, volume and tempo to find the type of voice that works best for you. Create a number of different types of voices, one for motivation, one to stop you doing things, one to make you feel loved, one to make you feel happy and so on.

Mastering your internal dialogue is a major key in mastering your life.

Beating the Internal Bully